we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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