she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
