Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
