"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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