my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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