Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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