dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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