why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
