i permit you to call me
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.