he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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