Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
