chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
