I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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