Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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