Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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