u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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