Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
that's an acceptable place to lick
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Randomize
