Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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