what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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