Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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