i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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