Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I would ride that face into the sunset
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
