Do vagina's smell?
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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