I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
