So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Randomize
