I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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