he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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