Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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