She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize