I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize