Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
false alarm. still invincible.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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