are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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