it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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