We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
