i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Randomize
