I wannas sexs uuuuu
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
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