You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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