After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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