you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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