North Korea, Best Korea!
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
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