That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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