Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
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