Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
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it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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