Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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