on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
