About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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