did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize