elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
