he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
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