Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Randomize